Stuff I Have Said (without context): Puns

"My hair is so naturally straight it scores a 0 on the Kinsey Scale!"

The Twelve Days Before Christmas, Pt. 6

I got a little lax on this.  The holidays and "Sybil" have finally gotten the best of me, and I am drunk and murderous right now.  If you went shopping today for last-minute gifts, I have two words for you, and they begin with FUCK YOU.


That is all.

Stuff I Have Said (without context): Too Sexy!

"It's like a rain dance!"

Must See

Only YOU can prevent vampires and goblins from running around in your bloodstream!

Stuff I Have Said (without context): Debate Nostalgia

"Yeah, I've got your core values right here."

Stuff I Have Said (without context): Reasons to Keep Me Off the Sales Floor

"You should have just given her a disc for 1000 free hours of AOL and left it at that."

Stuff I Have Said (without context): It's what plants crave!

"This is why abortion should not only be legal, but compulsory in many cases."